For years now, gamers have associated summer with a lack of quality titles to enjoy on their beloved console, handheld or PC. Occasionally, we might be lucky enough to receive a gem like Batman: Arkham Asylum in August, or a surprise hit like Infamous in June, but for the most part there is a serious drought of triple-A titles to keep us amused.

Since the release of Apple's widely successful iPhone, and the subsequent growth of the App Store, gamers both hardcore and casual have often looked to cheap downloads to keep them entertained when their PS3 and 360 cannot. Fantastic games are released on iOS almost every week, and there's a massive back catalogue of high-quality titles that are addictive, cheap and - most importantly - fun.

To help you through this all-too-familiar summer gaming drought, here are (in no particular order) my Top 10 iPhone Games to get you through the summer.

Editor's note: The prices, publishers and App Store ratings contained in this article are those from the U.K. App Store. Prices, publishers and ratings may vary in other territories, and in some territories some apps may be unavailable to download. Half-stars on the App Store are rounded up to the nearest whole star here, so 4.5 stars equates to five here.

Plants vs Zombies

Without wanting to sound lazy, there's very little I can say about Plants vs Zombies that I didn't say in my full review last year. What I will say is that Popcap's supremely popular PC tower-defence title is even better on iPhone, with the touchscreen controls lending themselves brilliantly to planting seeds and taking down the zombie hordes. The game looks and sounds just as good as it does on the PC, and the recent update - that offers native support for the iPhone 4's stunning Retina display - means that the crispness of the visuals are now pretty much on-par with the HD visuals of the Xbox Live Arcade port. With such addicting gameplay, great presentation and plenty of levels to keep you occupied, Plants vs Zombies is one game that should be on every iPhone owner's home screen.

Price: £1.99
Developer/Publisher: PopCap
Awards: Over 20 Game of the Year awards
App Store Rating: ★★★★★

Cut The Rope

As far as concepts for games go, there's no denying that the level of creativity on offer from App Store developers far surpasses the creativity of developers of console games. I mean, when would anybody else think to base a game around feeding sweets to a little monster?

Cut The Rope is all about - well - cutting ropes. On the end of the ropes are pieces of confectionery, and your job is to cut ropes, pop bubbles, blow balloons, pull back elastics and generally utilise physics and your brain to feed your little green friend. Much like Angry Birds, the excellent physics are what provide most of the fun in this puzzle game, but the way in which new mechanics are constantly introduced keeps it feeling fresh throughout the entire experience. There's a good amount of challenge and an abundance of levels to keep you occupied, and the game is full of charm and cutesiness that make it very hard to resist. Perhaps more than any other game on this list (Angry Birds aside), it has absolute universal appeal.

Price: £0.69 (or free 'Lite' version)
Developer/Publisher: Chillingo Ltd/ZeptoLab UK Ltd
Awards: Best Handheld, BAFTA 2011; Most Innovative, Best Casual/Puzzle, Pocket Gamer Awards 2011; Best Handheld, GDC Awards 2011; Apple Design Award Winner, WWDC 2011
App Store Rating: ★★★★★

ZombieSmash

I'd be lying if I told you the App Store wasn't full to the brim with games featuring zombies, and I'd also be lying if I said that there weren't already hundreds of tower-defence-esque titles available too. But, even though ZombieSmash unashamedly combines these two rather contrived ideals, it does it so well that it's rather impossible to ignore. The biggest weapon at your disposal in ZombieSmash is your fingers, as you grab your attackers and fling them around at will, in an attempt to defend your home. As you progress, weapons become available as well, and - just as in all tower-defence games - the more goodies that you unlock, the more fun there is to be had. You earn stars as you play, and you use these to unlock more weapons, ammo slots, barricades and the like. It's all very much what you'd expect, but the way in which you can just fling the zombies around if you so wish does give it a unique edge. The game also looks fantastic, with its cute art style juxtaposed against blood and gore, to great effect. The wonderfully squishy sound effects as zombies are killed, coupled with a surprisingly brilliant music score, mean that this game goes above and beyond most App Store production values as well. ZombieSmash definitely gives the brilliant Plants vs Zombies a run for its money, so buying it is an absolute no-brainer.

Price: £0.69
Developer/Publisher: gamedoctors UG
Awards: N/A
App Store Rating: ★★★★★

Angry Birds

What else is there to say about Angry Birds? It's the king of the App Store; the game that everyone goes to download first when they purchase a new iOS device. And all this success, for a game that sees you flinging chickens at pigs who are bunkered down in a series of increasingly well-defended structures? It seems utterly absurd that something so ridiculous could be so successful, but brilliantly fun physics and its wide array and variety of levels means that people just keep coming back for more. There isn't much strategy involved, and luck can also play a large part in how you do, but there's something incredibly satisfying about killing pigs with poultry.

Price: £0.69 (or free 'Angry Birds Lite' version)
Developer/Publisher: Clickgamer.com/Rovio Mobile Ltd.
Awards: N/A
App Store Rating: ★★★★★

Chop Chop Runner

As another simple concept with the 'just one more go' appeal, it's easy to see why Chop Chop Runner has become one of the most successful games on the App Store to date. You play as a ninja, and all that ninja wants to do is run from left to right. And he will stop at nothing.

You tap the screen to hop, hold the screen to leap and double tap the screen to attack enemies, as you make your way along the right of the screen. That's all there is to it. The landscapes and enemy placements are totally random, though, as it's all randomly generated each time you play, ensuring an unpredictable and reasonably fresh experience each time you boot it up to have a go. Like many popular games on the App Store, the game has a cute art style, with colourful backgrounds and detailed, hand-drawn characters. It's a charming little package, and has kept me occupied many a time on trains, buses and planes.

Price: £1.49
Developer/Publisher: Gamerizon
Awards: N/A
App Store Rating: ★★★★

Infinity Blade

Possibly the most high-profile game on the App Store amongst those in the hardcore gaming community, Infinity Blade is brought to us by Epic Games and Chair Entertainment, the developer behind the utterly brilliant Xbox Live Arcade title Shadow Complex, back in 2009. There is a sort of story to Infinity Blade's proceedings, but in all honesty, it's basically typical fantasy fare; there's a big bad guy with a powerful sword, and you have to kill him.

The headline feature (if you can call it that) of Infinity Blade is no doubt the visual prowess. On an iPhone 4 using the Retina display, this game looks absolutely phenomenal. Without wanting to anger the Nintendo fanboys of the world, I really do think that, on a technical level, this is better than the very best Wii titles. The sound effects, graphics and music wouldn't be out of place on a home console, so to see it on a phone is an incredible testament to just how far these devices have come, in such a short space of time.

In terms of its gameplay, though, Infinity Blade doesn't even try and act like a console game. There are no onscreen buttons, or the sort of awkward joysticks that Gameloft seem intent on using in every single one of their console-wannabe iPhone games. In fact, everything outside the combat is scripted. The combat is great, though, and also very satisfying as it can get bloody difficult as the game wears on, or if you attempt multiple playthroughs. Swiping at enemies to attack and defend works very well, and unlike other mobile games with this level of production value, you don't have to be ambidextrous to play. The game also has a levelling system and loot to collect to keep you going, and overall this is probably the most impressive game on the entire App Store. It might not have the addictive mobile characteristics of other games on this list, but you owe it to yourself to check it out if you have an iPhone.

Price: £1.99
Developer/Publisher: Chair Entertainment Group
Awards: Apple Design Award Winner, WWDC 2011; more than 20 'Game of the Year' and 'Top App' awards
App Store Rating: ★★★★★

Mega Jump

The concept of Mega Jump is one that has been well established on the App Store since its inception. The aim of the game is simply to soar as high as you can, by tilting the device to direct your little sprite, as he collects coins and power-ups to surge him through the sky and into the stars. What makes Mega Jump stand out amongst a plethora of similar titles, though, is its attention to detail; with bright, vibrant backgrounds and overall fantastic presentation, it's a game that's very easy to fall in love with. Leaderboards and achievements give you reason to keep coming back, as do the constant updates provided by the developers. Oh, and did I mention that it's free?

Price: FREE
Developer/Publisher: Get Set Games Inc.
Awards: N/A
App Store Rating: ★★★★

Flick Kick Football

The concept of Flick Kick Football could not be more simple; you're presented with a shot at goal, which - as you progress - will become more difficult to score, thanks to the presence of defenders and a moving goalkeeper. You just take shots at goal, over and over again. And how do you do this? You flick.

That's it.

As so many of the best iOS games are, this is incredibly simple, but just so addicting and oddly engaging that you could spend hours at a time playing it. Perhaps more than any other game on this list, it has that 'just one more go' appeal that makes it very difficult to stop playing. There isn't much variation between game modes, although turn-based online multiplayer is a nice touch that gives proceedings a competitive edge. The presentation is decidedly old school, with menus and loading screens that look like they've been pulled out of a 1970s football magazine. At only 69 of your English pennies, you really can't go wrong, regardless of whether or not you even like football.

Price: £0.69
Developer/Publisher: Prodigy Design Limited
Awards: N/A
App Store Rating: ★★★★★

Stick Cricket

For years now, Stick Cricket has been one of the most popular internet Flash games in the world, and so it seemed like only a matter of time before it made the jump to the App Store. The free version of the iOS game is rather limited in terms of modes, but for the relatively low cost of £1.79 you can enjoy pretty much all the trimmings that you enjoy on the flash version, including wireless multiplayer. The concept of Stick Cricket has always been simple, and so translates perfectly well to the iPhone; you simply tap left or right on the screen to swing your bat in that direction, and try to score as many runs as possible. I know many people (myself included) who have sunk hours and hours into the web version of this game, so being able to take it wherever you go is only going to increase the number of hours of your day in which your productivity levels remain at zero.

Unless, of course, you consider winning the Ashes in virtual stick form productive. In which case, carry on.

Price: FREE
Developer/Publisher: Stick Sports Ltd
Awards: N/A
App Store Rating: ★★★★★

Call of Mini: Zombies

There's no prizes for guessing which popular franchise the developers of Call of Mini: Zombies are ripping off with their little game, but there's no denying that this cutesy third-person shooter succeeds in being both addicting and fun. The variety is certainly there too, as although there are only two maps, there are thirteen unique weapons and twelve different types of zombie to shoot at. Whilst the weapons are fairly standard, and many of the enemy types seem to have been pulled straight out of Left 4 Dead, the game performs well overall, despite the use of touchscreen joysticks which have so often failed in the past. Here, they work well; the gameplay experience is smooth and enjoyable, although the lack of co-op does seem like somewhat of a missed opportunity. Like many of the games on this list, however, Call of Mini: Zombies is chock-full of charm and - much like Zombie Smash - the mix of cutesy characters, moody environments and horrific gore all come together to create a very pleasing aesthetic. Call of Mini: Zombies certainly won't win any awards for originality, but the concept has been executed tremendously well overall and for its nominal cost, you really can't go wrong.

Price: £0.69 (or FREE version)
Developer/Publisher: Triniti Interactive Limited
Awards: N/A
App Store Rating: ★★★★★

Labels: 2011, Feature, iOS, iPhone, Mobile, summer drought, Tom Acres, Top 10

World of Warcraft astounds me. It’s a miracle. It’s a drug. It’s a life-wrecker. In the last five years, WoW has evolved from a simple but impressive MMO cocoon into the fire-breathing, Tokyo-wrecking Mothra that now enlists over twelve million faithful subscribers, from whom it reaps a harvest of over one hundred million dollars every month.

Put simply, this game is the Beatles on crack, with Jesus replacing Ringo as drummer. Everyone knows it’s big. With a third expansion, Cataclysm, set to be dropped like a capitalist hydrogen bomb smack-bang in the middle of the holiday season, the franchise is about to swell to even more epic proportions.

As a chronic Blizzardian and sometimes-denizen of Azeroth, I want to herald this momentous occasion by recollecting why, over the last half-decade, both myself and my brethren have systematically joined, left, rejoined, and releft, this game. Here are ten reasons why I did both.

The Top Ten Reasons People Play

10: Gnome Warriors

Imagine Bilbo Baggins ^[1], the hilt of an epic 300-pound weapon clenched between each of his fists, leaping heroically into the monster equivalent of a modern tank, and slaying it, then lighting up a cigarette and riding his helicopter into the sunset. Sans Marlboro, WoW makes this this image entirely possible.

There’s no feeling quite comparable to getting pwned by Polly Pocket.

9: Rideable Sea Turtles and the Walrus People

You can’t play as one, but the mere existence of these gargantuan Inuit seal-men - what with their carved tusks and their grizzled grandpa-ish mustachios - somehow gives me that same good old faith in humanity that I had when I believed in Santa Claus. All they want to do is fish, eat, craft elaborate fishing poles, and wax those turtles all day (in a fun - not a weird, sexually metaphorical - way).

8: Holidays and Shindigs

Parties, parties, parties... there are just so many parties. WoW holidays and achievements are stupid, colourful, and pointless; the way good holidays ought to be, free from real world Thanksgiving-Christmas-Easter-Hanukkah-Ramadan-Kwanzaa-Festivus stress and/or drama.

7: Nostalgia

Remember the good old days, when you were young and naïve, and Azeroth was a brave new world ripe for exploring? When you would excitedly lean to the edge of your seat just to kill a boar? When you bragged to friends about your level 89 cooking skill? Even the most cynical of WoW veterans know, and want to re-discover, that innocent special place.

6: That Nerdy Special Place

Fuck cool people. There, I said it. Them and their rap music. Who needs James Dean when you’ve got millions of equally nerdy gamers available to quest with at a moment’s notice? Not only will they run dungeons with you; they’ll also want to hear about the viking-mead-horn you got at the Renaissance fair, and have heated conversations on who would win a three-way battle between Moses, Captain Planet, and Jean-Luc Picard.

5: Story

Warcraft wouldn’t be half as popular as it is without its lore. Let’s be honest; even though some of its storylines are so cliché that you can taste the bastard smoothie of Lovecraft, Salvatore, Tolkien, Warhammer, and Indian mythology as it slides down your suspension of disbelief, you’re interested in what happens to Azeroth. What Warcraft lacks in originality, it more than makes up for in character development, to the point where I really want to see how Thrall, Mograine, Varian, Sylvanas, Garrosh, and the rest of the cast respond to Deathwing’s tour of destruction come the upcoming expansion.

In a way, it’s become a nerd soap opera: we’re guilty to admit it, but if we don’t find out whether Thrall and Jaina hook up, we’re just going to freak.

4: Real World Stagnation

In the outside world, I am a simple geologist... but in here, I am Falcorn, Defender of the Alliance. I have braved the Fargodeep Mine, and defeated the Blood Fish at Jarod's Landing...

For one reason or another, the real world seems less fun or exciting than we expected, so what do we do? Do we turn our lives around, train our bodies and minds until they are temples of perfection, then join an Indonesian pirate cartel and live out our fantasies in real time? Not a chance in hell. We’re smarter than that, and do it one better... we log on to a place where we can be as badass as the heroes we secretly see ourselves as, in a setting that still allows our fleshy husks to look like this. That’s freedom of choice, baby. Imagine that was said by Bruce Campbell.

This goes not just for World of Warcraft, but for pretty much every role playing game since Greg Gygax rolled a 20-sided die.

3: Friends

Yes, MMO nerds can have them. No, they don’t need to include David Schwimmer.

This happens every expansion: one real-world friend starts mentioning the possibility of getting back into WoW, the seed is planted in his or her comrades who have themselves been looking for a new game to play during a lull in real life (see #4), and a chain reaction is put in motion. Slowly but surely, dozens of amigos sign on, lured by discussions of exotic mounts and witty guild names. Blizzard makes it easy, giving players - I’m not kidding - a goddamned rocket ship for recruiting their loved ones. By the time the expansion releases, one WoW subscriber has recruited an armada of comrades with which to battle the evil hordes.

For a game founded on community, making and playing with friends is half the fun. The other half is engineering.

2: Money

World of Warcraft may be repetitive, but as far as games go it’s cheap and reliable. While other gamers empty their pockets month after month purchasing a veritable arsenal of new games, the frugal Warcraftian chooses instead to ration his spending, dolling out a smaller fee to play a challenging game that is constantly patched and updated.

Crazy as it may sound at first, shelling out $15 a month to play WoW is a thrifty option for the chronic gamer. And the worldwide economy right now? Well, it’s stressed. Now might be a good time to save whatever rupees you can.

1: Expansion Packs

Nothing says “come back to WoW, you big, sexy, dwarven hunter with your enormous ram drinking horn and your intoxicating ale-soaked beard” like new worlds to explore in an expansion pack. I’m no mathmetician, but according to my calculations (and they’re never wrong), each expansion has increased World of Warcraft’s subscription rate by one hundred trillion percent. And that’s not counting current subscribers.

What turns any MMO stale is endless repetition. Without the flavour that comes with new environments, evolving challenges, and fresh aesthetics, even World of Warcraft’s gargantuan fan base would wither. Expansion packs naturally offer an alternative to such lacklustre finales, combining all of the necessary ingredients listed above to create a concoction of subscription longevity that will keep the game exciting until time comes for the next fun injection.



So. With all these good reasons for people to join the legions of WoW, why does anybody leave for pastures that couldn’t possibly be greener? Sit on your square of rug, my little friend, and let Papa Bear read you a story about paradise lost.

The Top Ten Reasons That People Leave Azeroth Behind

10: Tauren on Kodos

Is that a door I’m heading into? Or a field? Or maybe the shell of a giant turtle?

You might as well travel while wearing a blindfold.

9: General Chat

Maybe I’m old and crotchety, but people are idiots. What was once the racist, homophobic/erotic, uninspired, shallow-stream-of-word-vomit consciousness of Barrens chat is now the racist, homophobic/erotic, uninspired, shallow-stream-of-word-vomit consciousness of the entire world (of Warcraft). This is the real enemy of WoW, more evil and dangerous than Arthas, Illidan, Deathwing, and Back to the Future’s Biff Tannen combined.

Try as you might (by, say, surrounding yourself with a guild of balanced, intelligent human beings, or even joining a roleplaying server), it will find you, wiggle its smacktardy into your consciousness, and leave you mad ^[2].

8: The Bed Sores

That and the muscle atrophy. Sometimes, it’s just time to go outside.

7: The Pain Caused by Natural Sunlight

Don’t worry, you can fix this. Use baby steps. First, stand near a window, letting the heat beat onto you through the glass. Don’t shy away. Next, gradually step outside. Find a spot without any trees or cloud cover, and bask in the Vitamin D. Pose for increased effect. Lower the SPF level of your sunscreen hour-by-hour, until you once again tan without hissing. Once this is done, continue speaking comfortably to women.

Either that, or you could just put a lamp next to the computer and raid Icecrown Citadel. Again.

6: Sexual Intercourse

If you don’t get off WoW and go outside, you won’t find a mate. If you don’t find a mate, you subtract one nerd from the future population. If you don’t add your nerdy genetic makeup to the gene pool, then the jocks win.

Imagine that for a minute: a world of pure, unadulterated jockiness. The quality of the television and video game industries would decline. Ocarinas would go unsold on eBay. We would never receive the hovercrafts which we’ve been promised.

It’s the grave and hallowed responsibility of every nerd to pass on our tradition and culture to the next generation by bravely facing the mainstream, finding that equally-nerdy special someone, and getting laid. Planting a seed equals life’s epic quest.

5: Smarmy, Pretty, Dainty Alliance

Goddammit, Carl, you’re tanking a seventy-storey fire-breathing nether dragon bent on eating the universe. I don’t care if your hair gets ruffled!

4: Sweaty, Meaty, Testosterone-Addicted Horde

Football? Football! FOOTBALL!!

3: Neverending Game Syndrome

In only 172 hours of grinding, the Egyptian cat people will fucking love me.

2: The WoW-sick

After playing for more than four hours at a time, gamers with even the best constitution scores may contract the dreaded WoW-sick. I’m not a doctor, but if I were I would safely say that this illness, morbius mundiprofessiobelli gravis, has the ability to ravage your positive chi, leaving you a douchebucket.

I’ve lost friends to the WoW-sick. For hours after playing they talked only of matters Warcraft - what their DPS was, how many Horde heads they'd mounted in the guild living room after a one-sided Battleground, and which synonyms of “badass” could be used to describe their armour. Now and then, this talk is fine. People shouldn’t be afraid to brag a little about their feats, or epic fun they’re having. That’s just amiable; it’s sharing. It’s when demons sneak into a gamer’s brain through his or her ear cavity and make them so addicted that they can’t mentally leave Azeroth that the WoW-sick becomes a serious issue.

This illness wouldn’t be so bad if Warcraft wasn’t a game that relies on hardcore addiction to maintain a flock of loyal subscribing sheep like you and me. A severely addicted player will spend months, even years, living with the WoW-sick from day-to-day, floating through social situations and life on Earth awkwardly as if stuck in a Descartian dream, all while looking forward to re-entering the digital world in which they truly feel at home.

There is only one way to cure a friend with the WoW-sick, and it is simple and effective: shoot them in the brain, right smack-dab in the middle of the forehead. Works every time. Unless I’m thinking of zombies. Maybe give them a diet of bread and tea, and encourage vomiting. Urinate on them? Bathe them in the blood of a cloven-hoofed animal while chanting to Kali-ma? I don’t remember.

1: Serious Business

Nothing - nothing in the entire universe of gaming - annoys me like WoW players who act like rock stars; rather, rock stars who are self-righteous, egocentric dicks. Somewhere along the line these people forgot that they were playing a game and adopted a policy of angry, competitive assholism that they spit at generally everyone they meet. They’ve had the WoW-sick so long that they’ve mutated, morphing from real people with compassion and feelings into villains from a John Hughes movie.

These gems of humanity are lurking in every raid, every dungeon group, every major city chat, just waiting to spew their frothing, needlessly belligerent word-vomit all over the first person who does something they don’t take a liking to. This guy is a perfect example. As is this guy. And these other gentlemen. Conversations like this one happen all the time when you play with self-proclaimed 'hardcore' Warcrafters.

All. The. Damned. Time.

In WoW - and, let's be honest, most time-intensive games - 'hardcore' seems to be a synonym for 'immature, short-fused mental patient'. It’s just not fun to play with, and should be avoided at all costs. More than any other reason on this list, these idiots tarnish the magic of WoW and inspire gamers like me to leave Azeroth for pastures greener and less douche-infested. Way to go, gents. Way to go.



See you all at the Cataclysm. You’ll recognize me easily - I’ll be the worgen hunter chasing Deathwing without pants. Rock, rock on.

[1] Yeah, halfling, I know.
[2] Insane, not angry. Maybe both.

Labels: Cataclysm, Columns, Greg Mengel, State of the Union, Top 10, World of Warcraft

I shall begin my first ever piece for Gamer's Guide to Life with an apology. Sorry for my reserved judgements in favour of the games as featured below: I apologise now if I have left out any games from the past few years that perhaps deserve to be in such a thorough list. Regardless, these are my most favoured games of the generation which, we are told, we are only midway through.

So, without further ado, here are my top 10 games of this generation. Long may it continue.

Fallout 3

What better game to pick up the mantle for the first of the list than Bethesda's post-apocalyptic RPG, Fallout 3. Fitting, since this generation has pretty much birthed the open-world genre which we know see in abundance. Following on from the critically-acclaimed Oblivion (which I could never get on with), Fallout 3 was a lesson to potential RPG developers in how to create an immersive world with an engaging storyline and excellent role-playing mechanics. Hours could disappear roaming the wasteland for hidden delights, only boosted by the additional DLC that was offered after release.

LittleBigPlanet

One of my favourite games of 2008, LittleBigPlanet was like nothing truly seen before. Spawning the label of 'Play, Create, Share', over two million levels have been created by its community to date - I lent my talents to two. A platformer at heart, the level designer and community features were where the game really stood out, with unbelievable levels created by fantastically creative people. Search for anything within LBP's servers and you'll probably find a match. From re-creations of classic Mario levels to representations of people's home lives; LBP was worthy of its limelight.

Rock Band

For being the first game to introduce the full band set-up and hours upon hours of lost time, Harmonix's return-to-rhythm-action after Guitar Hero let us run wild in our search for rock stardom - now on drums and mic, as well as guitar. The sequel may have refined the template, but the success of the first game was praise enough after Activision's vital head start with the Guitar Hero series. Cluttering our living rooms with cheap plastic peripherals ever since; Rock Band, we salute you.

Grand Theft Auto IV

Possibly the most sought-after sequel of the current generation, Grand Theft Auto 4 set the record at the time for the best single-day and week sales for a video game, despite its 18 age certificate. The departure from the fun-filled San Andreas to the much grittier life of immigrant Niko Bellic was bold, although one which was needed. Despite the clunky controls, GTA IV was exceptional in its design, with the hugely-detailed Liberty City inspired by NYC, and an exciting cast of characters.

Uncharted 2

Uncharted 2 has to be considered over the first since it got nearly everything spot on. Superbly animated character models and expertly directed cut-scenes seamlessly integrated with gameplay, and Naughty Dog's treasure-hunting Nathan Drake is set to be one of Sony's flagships for years to come. If you haven't played it yet and don't yet quite understand the hype regarding Sony's console, try it. You won't be disappointed.

Heavy Rain

The third PS3 exclusive to appear on my list is also the most recent. Released this February, I only got a chance to play the 'interactive drama' around a month ago. Set apart from any other game, Heavy Rain is an experience unlike any other. Excellent cinematography, resounding score and an involving narrative imbue cinematic sense, whilst the frankness of its moral choice philosophy gave each player a feeling of crafting their own experience. I was taken aback by how well the game was conveyed, and utterly spellbound by the plotting.

Mass Effect 2

Bioware's sci-fi space saga gave a number of reasons why it ought to be considered one of the best games of this generation. Not only did Bioware create an exceptional and fully in-depth universe of alien species and planetary intergalactic wars, but there was a mixture between the cinematic ambition of Uncharted 2 and the moral choices of Heavy Rain. An RPG has rarely become so fully polished as this; I await the third to conclude the trilogy.

Forza Motorsport 2

I'm reluctant to put the third in the Forza franchise onto the list since I felt slightly let down in its online fuctionality, which was plagued from day one. Instead, I'll go with the sequel to the original Xbox game, which was the first true driving simulator for the current generation, and one which still performs admirably and looks excellent even some time after release. The online was well handled, as was the progression of the career mode. Whether Polyphony Digital can match its ambition with Gran Turismo 5 is another story, but it certainly has a tough task ahead.

Halo 3

Finish the fight? Yeah, right. It might have failed to live up to the hype in terms of its epic conclusion to the trilogy, but it can be argued that Halo 3's success lay within multiplayer, with its matchmaking still one of the most played on Xbox Live. Adding experience points and character customisation to the massive Halo 2 online foundation, it's the game which I jump onto for some multiplayer action before any other.

Mirror's Edge

Though received quite poorly, Mirror's Edge is one of my more favoured titles for one reason: it tried something different and it worked. The first person perspective was an odd choice given the free-running gameplay, but EA and Dice delivered the goods in epic proportions. With fast and exhilarating game mechanics, it was slightly unforgiving and frustrating at times, but it still ought to be remembered for some time to come. Eegardless of the fact that it lies for mere pounds in bargain buckets around the country.

Labels: Feature, Richard Birkett, Top 10

When time came for me to write my very first Gamer's Guide to Life column, I flirted with a lot of possible subjects. An exposition on the pros and cons of including co-op in a new game, aimed at designers. A tribute to the greatest mounts, hogs, and other miscellaneous rides in the history of gaming lore. A detailed physical and mental comparison of EA Sports kingpin Peter Moore and the demon lord Satan. There were a few options on the table.

After days of deliberation, I finally decided that I wanted to start off my column, and the new year, right - by reminding the gaming world of all the good titles that are waiting for us in 2010. My method? A top ten list, complete with my thoughts on what aspects of each game look good, bad, or ugly.

So without further ado, faithful internet audience, please change into your most relaxing evening robe, grab a scotch, set up your laptop at your comfiest EZ chair, kick your feet up, and enjoy digesting my thoughts on what the year 2010 will offer the gaming industry in Gods, Galaxies, and Jpopgasms. Any intellectual regurgitations of those opinions can be left in the comments box at the end of the article. Bon appetit.


Gods, Galaxies, and Jpopgasms - My Top Ten Most Anticipated Games of 2010


10. God of War III



Reasons to get excited God of War II left the gaming world with a cliffhanger when it ended, just as Kratos, Gaia, and the mighty Titans began their epic march to Mount Olympus in order to kill Zeus, the Almighty King of the Gods, once and for all. It was was a cruel exercise in the art of the cliffhanger ending, but it means that in God of War III, we can all be pretty sure that Zeus is going down. That means more action; more merciless slaughter of countless innocent civilians for green health clouds; more interactive intercourse with concubines for experience points; and more flashy, epic, seizure-inducing aesthetics, the likes of which will have even Michael Bay saying "Whoah. Okay guys, that's enough. I'm going outside."

Based on what we can see in the demo, it looks like the gameplay in God of War III will be pretty similar to that of its forefathers - as usual, playing Kratos will make you feel like a piping hot dish of invincible, ancient, Greek, hetero man meat. It also seems like the environmental design of Kratos's newest adventure will have the same reliably entertaining, Zelda-esque puzzles that we solved in the series' first two installments. Once I can cope with the fact that it will probably be little more than a digital altar to the gods of senseless violence, I'm sure I'll have bucketloads of fun playing the third God of War.

Reasons to narrow your eyes and doubt Oh, there are so many reasons. Besides the rape of classical literature, there’s always the cliché, unimaginative dialogue that seems to hallmark the series, or the fact that by the time he gets to Zeus, Kratos will have probably already committed genocide on 95% of the Greek Pantheon, which will both make it hard for Sony to plan a sequel and cause a major disturbance in the literary Force. This brings up some valid questions regarding God of War III's philosophy. Is it considered ethnic cleansing when you wipe out a race of gods, or does divinity fall into a different category than human ethnicity when slaughtered? Men can become gods. According to Wikipedia and my high school World Literature class, Heracles successfully made the leap from man to Mount Olympus. That must make divinity more of a club. So when Kratos kills every god he passes on the street, that's not ethnic genocide, it's... institutional genocide? But aren't national governments a type of institution? Is he wiping out a nation? Okay, now I'm confused. It doesn't matter - the point is, as you saw in the trailer, in some capacity Kratos will be getting genocide-y, and that disturbs me in many, many ways.

Problems with the abundance of genocide that playing God of War III will force gamers to endure, my other big problem with the series has to do with the reception to its installments past. Having gone to the Game Developer's Conference in the last five years, I have had to grit my teeth and think happy thoughts while crowds of game designers went so far as to actually call the writing in God of War "a work of art." That's just... well I'll leave it to Dr. Cox. God of War is the creative morphation of myths that actually are art into a format that is easy for the modern international public to digest. Calling it art is like taking somebody's else's baklava (we're on a Greek theme here), mashing it up with a spoon, dumping the remnants in a blender, purifying it, pouring it into a couple million glasses with a tiny, football-printed umbrella in at the top of each glass (to represent God of War's excess testosterone), and having the nerve to say you made baklava. I hope to Olympus that this time the fans of God of War III don't carry the fanboy torch and once again get carried away with what I consider to be misguided praise, at least when it comes to the game's literature, for the third time.


9. Bioshock 2



Reasons to get excited While the single-player campaign in Bioshock 2 looks solidly entertaining, it's the game's innovative new story-based multiplayer, in which players unlock bits and pieces of Bioshock lore by playing in and winning multiplayer matches, that makes my ears perk up with interest. Supposedly, it will work like this - it is 1959, one year before the events of the first Bioshock, and the underwater city of Rapture is in a state of Civil War. In the midst of that chaos, six playable characters from a grab bag of backgrounds - a welder, a housewife, a football star, a businessman, a pilot, and an Indian mystic - have been hired by a Plasmid manufacturing company, Sinclair Solutions, to test their merchandise. Since that merchandise consists mainly of products that specialize in killing, maiming, healing, shocking, pummeling, flambéing, and exploding, you can imagine what testing is like. Thus, the the stage is set for sub-oceanic multiplayer violence. As whichever-character-you-select wins matches, he or she will advance through a story arch that will uncover a myriad of secrets revolving around the events that led to the fall of Rapture and what happened in its brutal Civil War. You'll also receive wave after wave of new products and abilities to "test" on your opponents, compliments of your sponsor. The better you do in a match, the more new toys Sinclair Solutions will send you to play with, the more fun you'll have trying them out on other players, which will unlock more Bioshock lore and story content. As far multiplayer reward systems go, it sounds like it could be great.

Reasons to narrow your eyes and doubt Excited, though I am, to be revisiting the retro-futuristic underwater metropolis of Rapture after our first visit there in the original Bioshock, I'm still a little wary that this exciting new multiplayer won't take off. There are a lot of entrenched multiplayer games for it to compete with, and serious multiplayer gamers may not be willing to move from a skill-based game they're familiar with to a skill based game they've never tried, especially when all they know about the latter is that for some reason the goal of it is to make a housewife to shoot an Indian mystic with bullets and bolts of lightning so that she can throw the little girl from The Ring down a tube. It's a lot of change to digest at once. If Bioshock 2 can successfully attract a faithful multiplayer community that will play for longer than a couple months, then we might be able to expect its story-based multiplayer to be continually updated, which equals fun not only today, but two years from now as well. If it can't garner that kind of faithful multiplayer following, then Bioshock 2 will have to settle with being a moderately fun, but still only mediocre, game.

An update -- our very own Chris Hawke has a review of Bioshock 2 out and ready for your viewing! Having played the game myself, I second most of his opinions, and approve of his final score. It's worth a look.


8. World of Warcraft: Cataclysm




Reasons to get excited Because the human race has been enslaved, and World of Warcraft is our soma. The newest installment of everyone's favorite alternative to heroin should prove especially addicting, as it's full of attractive new features that are bound to have both the hooked and the casual adventuring deep into the night. They include:

- Two New Playable Races -- Buccaneering Jewish stereotype Goblins for the Horde, and the gothic Worgen, a nation of humans afflicted by a curse that turned them all werewolves, for the Alliance
- A level 85 cap
- A series of sexy makeovers for crotchety old Azerothian zones
- Flying mounts in Kalimdor and the Eastern Kingdoms
- Archaeology: A new secondary skill that would make Indiana Jones proud.
- Guild Achievements
- New Class and Race Combinations. Finally, the world will know the fury of a gnomish priest.
- Heroic Versions of Old Dungeons
- Myriad other ways to forget the bitter, bitter pain of the real world

Reasons to narrow your eyes and doubt We know what we're getting into here. Though each expansion has added new worlds of depth to an already massively deep and addicting game, World of Warcraft is still, at its roots, the same classic MMORPG that it was back in 2005, and it has many of those same, age-old classic MMORPG problems. Chief among those problems are the inhuman amount of time and dedication it takes to stay competitive after reaching the level cap; and repetition, repetition, repetition.

If you quit WoW three years ago because you were bored with the game at level 70, you'll probably find yourself quitting due to the same kind of boredom at level 85. Still, for the last five years WoW has been my favourite "filler game" - a game that I repeatedly come back to whenever there's no other spectacular game out there for me to play. With all the new features in Cataclysm, WoW’s role as a game-for-serious-gamers-to-play-while-waiting-for-a-better-game-to-come-along is only becoming more solid.


7. Fallout: New Vegas



Reasons to get excited It's quasi/sort of/basically official - Fallout: New Vegas will be transporting us into a brand new apocalyptic carnival sometime in Autumn 2010. I could say a few things to get you excited about this upcoming hit, but I've got this thing where I attempt to avoid writing about what's already been covered on this website. Instead, I'm going to refer you to my fellow Gamers Guide To Life contributor, the famous Jacques Hulme, who wrote a succinct analysis of the recently released Fallout: New Vegas trailer. Jacques is a self-declared "rather large Fallout fan," which seems to be an exercise in understatement, and he can give you a much better taste that I of why/how/in what capacity this upcoming RPG looks oh so good. Just jump over to his latest article to see what he thinks. You can check out the Fallout: New Vegas trailer he discusses in the conveniently placed embedded video in the article too.

Reasons to narrow your eyes and doubt Instead of being developed by the same team at Bethesda that crafted Fallout 3; Fallout: New Vegas has been developed by Obsidian Studios, a company founded by some of the designers who worked on Fallout 2 back in days of old. This will make Fallout: New Vegas different than Fallout 3, in at least a few key ways. So far, both Obsidian and Bethesda have been holding their cards pretty close to their chests when asked how the look and feel of Fallout: New Vegas might differ from Fallout 3, so we - the gaming people - really have almost no idea how different the newest installment in the Fallout universe will be from its predecessors. I'm not worried - the trailer looks great, and Obsidian has previous Fallout experience. New Vegas should be everything we expect it to be. It may even be better than we all expect.


6. Gears of War III



Reasons to get excited When the gentleman Clifford Bleszinski (formerly known as CliffyB, currently known to some as Dude Huge, often referred to as "a giant douchebag") makes a game, he makes a good one, dammit. Which means we can expect solidly fun things from the third installment of the Gears of War franchise, which is his baby.

While it's not official that Gears of War III will be released in 2010, signs in the rumour mill point to yes. Apparently they also point to the existence of a "far more ambitious five player co-op experience." If this is true, then every gamer with an Xbox will need to start searching for four trustworthy co-op partners now in preparation for this massive five-player campaign. With as fun as co-op has been in the first two Gears of War titles, it's relatively safe to assume that...

A) This rumor is true, and...
B) The Gears of War III campaign is going to bring co-op gaming to brave new heights.

A five-person cooperative story mode is worth trying out in any game, even one that when bought will support the walking parody of Hollywood that is CliffyB.

Reasons to narrow your eyes and doubt First, the story in Gears of War is about as "good" as the story in the God of War franchise, so instead of going on that rant again, I'm just going to cite my "God of War III reasons to doubt" segment above, and move on.

With that taken care of, my biggest worry regarding Gears of War III is that the rumors will prove false, and its release date will be confirmed for sometime in 2011. Giant self-proclaimed douche bag though he is (and really, he is the VY Canis Majorisof gaming douche), Dude Huge is a dependably great game designer, so it's safe to bet that whatever he creates will be solidly entertaining. So I guess all that's left to do is start praying to Jesus that we'll be playing Gears of War III with four of our friends by his birthday. Even if you're Atheist, Buddhist, Muslim, Thorist, or Agnostic, we can't take any chances - dust up those prayin' knees and think of the co-op.


5. Dead Rising 2



Reasons to get excited The original Dead Rising is a classic, and the only zombie game to stay even mildly true to the holy zombie dogma handed down to us by legendary director George Romero, and nurtured by Max Brooks, his prophet. Capcom was so true to them, in fact, that they were only barely able to dismiss charges for copyright infringement. That being said, it looks like from a gaming standpoint the newest Dead Rising looks like it will be even better than its predecessor, while from a writing standpoint, it will still feel true to its roots as a testament to the zombie movie classics. As a longtime fan and chronic re-watcher of films like Dawn of the Dead, Night of the Living Dead, Day of the Dead, and 28 Days Later (no, 28 Days's zombies aren't dogmatic, but it's still one of the best zombie movies of all time), my baseball bat hand starts to itch at the mere thought of this game.

Reasons to narrow your eyes and doubt The first Dead Rising had a tendency sometimes to get overly flashy, sensationalistic and - well, anime. This was especially true when you fought bosses, usually surviving humans who had dealt with the invasion of zombies by turning totally and completely psychotic. I'm okay with the idea of fighting those whose experiences with the undead horde has left them mentally deranged, but there comes a point, when I'm being chased by a giant, bloodthirsty clown juggling chainsaws and pummeling my main character with deadly rubber balls, that I get yanked back through the fourth wall, and my suspension of belief snaps like Peter Jackson's scale circa the filming of the Lord of the Rings. If Capcom ups the anime, and they've already flirted with the idea by showing the game's protagonist attaching chainsaws to his stunt motorcycle and going for a hyper-dismembering joyride through an undead mob, then Dead Rising II could lose its classic zombie movie touch. Without that classic zombie movie feeling, Dead Rising 2 would just be another generic zombie game, and not worth playing.


4. Super Mario Galaxy 2



Reasons to get excited According to GameRankings.com, the first Super Mario Galaxy is the highest rated game for the Wii, and the third-highest rated video game of all time. Just to put that into perspective, the only games higher than it on that list are the legendary Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time and Grand Theft Auto IV, and Ocarina of Time is video gaming's Citizen Kane.

From what it looks like, Mario's second venture into space is taking the same recipe for success and adding dozens of new maps, new characters, new powers, and new features for Mario to explore, meet, use, and unlock. We already know for sure that Yoshi will be playing a major role. Nintendo of America CEO Reginald "Reggie" Fils-Aime, a man whose Children of the Corn style happy stare will forever keep me awake at night, has told the gaming public to expect more of a challenge in Super Mario Galaxy 2 than in its predecessor, and the benevolent gaming legend Shigeru Miyamoto has released hints that it will also focus a bit more on plot. Frankly, when it comes to Mario, Nintendo has long since needed to convince me. I know it'll have Mario. I know it'll have Luigi. I know having Yoshi will be a nice plus. I know I'll have fun replaying every level to find all of the galaxy's hidden stars. I just know that this game will be dependably fun.

Reasons to narrow your eyes and doubt Super Mario Galaxy was the only game that I've actually seen a person throw up after playing. No, it wasn't me. Its defiance of gravity and the laws of physics may be too much for some people. Whatever you do, DO NOT hand the controller to your Aunt Verna and walk out of the room to get a snack, or she WILL attempt to play, and she'll trigger her vertigo, which will cause her to fall, and break that good hip she's been saving, and the family will be forced to spend Thanksgiving dinner at the hospital, and you'll feel really guilty, but you'll still want to go home and finish your game, which will make you remember how Aunt Verna interrupted it by breaking her stupid hip in the first place, and then you'll realize what you just said to yourself and feel even more guilty, and you suddenly won't feel like playing. I've seen it once, I've seen it a thousand times. Situations like that aside, Super Mario Galaxy 2 should have enough fun puzzles and quirky levels to keep entire families entertained for weeks, if not months, of play.


3. Heavy Rain



Reasons to get excited Heavy Rain is one of the first major attempts to create a game that is built entirely on human interactions and story. As a person who has spent many hours attempting to formulate game design ideas from the top down rather than the bottom up, I'm extremely interested to see how the big brains at Quantic Dream pull off a story-first, gameplay-second video game experience. In a video game industry built on a foundation of fast-paced games with ridiculously shallow plotlines, this project is a giant bold move. Set in a dark noir atmosphere wrought with adult themes, Heavy Rain will be a game that explores brave new territories in the industry by relying on the feelings and responses of its players, rather than flashing lights and overly-epic aesthetics, to engage its audience. Every day that we step closer to Heavy Rain's release, the gaming community is given more and more Heavy Rain teasers from Quantic to digest. Each one of them looks more emotionally engaging and psychologically tremoring than the last. Based on what we've seen, Heavy Rain looks like it will change the way we think about video games. It looks more important than most games somehow, more real. More connected to the way human beings think and go through life. I hope from the bottom of my core that it delivers.

Reasons to narrow your eyes and doubt Much as I want Heavy Rain to be successful enough to add a bulky amount of credence to the camp that supports adding better writing to more blockbuster games, until the game comes out, nobody can guess how fun it will actually be. It's easy to doubt that the dialogue-first, action-second design concept of Heavy Rain will be as fun as a game based solely on action. After all, we're used to action - we were raised on it. I sincerely hope that Heavy Rain breaks through that stranglehold. Frankly, the gaming community needs it to.


2. Final Fantasy XIII




Reasons to get excited Where to begin... Because it has already been released and sold millions of copies in Japan, we know a lot about how Final Fantasy XIII plays out. Apparently, the Japanese love it, and I’m using italics here for a reason. A review of Final Fantasy XIII in the Japanese anime and gaming magazine Dengeki declared that the game deserved not the plebian, normal perfect score of 100 out of 100, but a 120 out of 100 instead, and a reader’s poll in the January 2010 edition of the famous Japanese gaming magazine Famitsu dubbed Final Fantasy XIII the greatest game of all time. Ever. Sorry, Link, time to hand over the Ocarina.

By far the highest universally praised aspect of Final Fantasy XIII is its dynamic new battle system, which we know requires players to utilise long chains of massive combos and use their characters in highly specific “Roles” to fight. This new method of battling giant bosses and monstrous hordes is by far the part of the game that I’m most excited for, especially when I hear whisperings in the online gaming community that “Some boss battles will make you feel like a genius.” Bring it on.

Add eye-popping aesthetics and a half-decent story, and Final Fantasy XIII looks like it could be a particularly fun and memorable game.

Reasons to narrow your eyes and doubt I fear that a large part of the reason that Dengeki and Famitsu gave Final Fantasy XIII such high marks has a lot to do with their huge otaku and anime audiences, both of which would love the same aspects of the game that make me nervous. Like a scene in one of the earliest Final Fantasy XIII trailers, wherein a teenage girl easily slays dozens of professional soldiers with a gravity ring and the power of dance. I’m just not buying it. As I discussed in an earlier article, games with this kind of over-sensitization often drive me to epileptic attacks. Their crazy plots and colorful aesthetics are just too much for my frail western senses.

But that’s not my main issue with this game. I’ve been reading comic books way too long not to be able to suspend my disbelief for a couple of super powers and an out-of-this world plot. My main worry is that, based on what we’ve seen in its trailers, FFXIII's plot will be hitting the Japanese version of Michael Bay territory. Everything will look awesome, but only for the sake of... being really, terribly awesome. In the trailers, for example, we see lots of running, jumping, shooting, graceful falling, and sensual hair swooping, and little information on what the plot of this game is going to be, or why one of the main characters dresses like an out-of-work Abercrombie model. Come on! I’d really like to know. Don’t say it's because it makes him look cool/stylish/at all like a bad ass, or I'll lose faith in humanity, right here and now.

So far all of the western reviews of FFXIII have given it thumbs up for gameplay, but thumbs down for problems like an overly linear plot line, forgettable villains, and visual environments that feel more like the backdrop of a 1950s movie than a rich interactive world (my words). That translates to a cumulative review score of 85.50% (as of February 10, 2010). That's a little low for the game Famitsu readers called the greatest ever made. This discrepancy is curious, and it basically sums my worries going into FFXIII's European and North American release - I hope the reasons Japan loves this game so much aren't lost in translation.


1. StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty



Reasons to get excited Hark! Rejoice, and be glad! Let all the angels sing, in heavenly chorus! After twelve years of arduous, sometimes painful waiting, the sequel to one of the greatest games ever made is finally, finally due for release. It's been such a long wait, and we Starcraft fans have gone through so much. Only this can begin to sum up how we feel; I think I speak for everyone when I say that I knew you could make it happen, gaming Jesus. I'll hold up my end of the bargain and sacrifice my firstborn son.

Let's go over the reasons why this game is going to be amazing. First of all, it's being billed by Blizzard as "the ultimate real-time strategy game." Given the fact that Blizzard has been king of the real-time strategy market for over the last ten years, that's not even a shocking statement - it's almost self-explanatory. Presidents lie, Loki cheats, the Academy Awards are political, and Blizzard always develops great real-time strategy that makes the entire gaming industry rethink the genre. It's very dependable. Second, StarCraft 2 will be released with a shiny new version of our old friend, Battle.net, which should significantly improve online play. Third, an upgraded Galaxy Editor will allow players to create their own maps to play on with more detail than in any other Blizzard game yet. Fourth, the best "premium maps" created in Galaxy Editor will also be hosted by Blizzard on a StarCraft II Marketplace, where they will be sold at a modest fee. This is a brilliant move, and will be an excellent way for amateur designers to get noticed. Fifth, and the reason I've spent the bulk of my young adulthood and adolescence anticipating a StarCraft sequel, is to continue the game's rich, interesting story. I've been dying to get an update on the goings-on of characters like Jim Raynor, Kerrigan, Zeratul, Artanis, and Arcturus Mengsk.

There are five good reasons why Starcraft II should rock, and if I dug around a bit, I could probably find a few dozen more. That's the beauty of Blizzard games, and of the StarCraft franchise - they rarely disappoint. If StarCraft 2 meets even half of the gaming community's expectations for it, then we can start betting on it as a shoe-in for Game of the Year. If history has taught us anything, it will meet them all.

Reasons to narrow your eyes and doubt Since the Star Wars prequels, I've always been wary of what happened when this... led to this. It was like happily celebrating Christmas for years, and then waking up one magical December morning and tiptoeing into the living room to find Santa, empty bottles of eggnog scattered around his feet, cheeks extra rosy, wearing only his red hat and stockings, scratching himself with one hand, and aiming with the other as he urinated on the tree, pausing only to make gross racial slurs. It scarred me, and I never want it to happen again. So basically, I don't want Starcraft II to turn into the Santa that urinated on my tree.


So those are my Top 10 Most Anticipated Games of 2010. With so many interesting titles keep us ignoring work, families, and general responsibilities deep into the night, it looks like it's going to be a pretty good year. If you agree with my choices, or have a problem with any specific part of my list, feel free to let me know via comments section below, and I will ignore it as soon as possible. Just kidding. Maybe. Thanks for reading, keep reading, tell your friends how much fun you had reading, write in StumbleUpon that you enjoyed reading, and continue periodically visiting in order to continue reading the fine articles of Gamer's Guide to Life. I'll be back in a few weeks with another edition of State of the Union - see you then.

Greg

Labels: Columns, Greg Mengel, State of the Union, Top 10