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Hey, console fanboys: stop fighting and hook up already
by Greg Mengel
29.1.11

For as long as I can remember, gamers have been bickering over what console is 'the best'. 360, PS3, PC, Wii, PS2, Gamecube, N64, Saturn, GameGear, DS, PSP, Genesis, SNES, NeoGeo, NES, Atari... or even the grand-daddy of them all, the wise but ancient Magnavox Odyssey. People have spent more time on these arguments than over who's the better captain, Picard or Kirk [1].

Discussing and comparing consoles can be fun, and should be embraced by gamers.

But should it be 80% of what we discuss?

Whenever I check out the comments for a new game review, or scan over the headlines of a game journalism aggregator like N4G, I instinctively cover my testicles. Why? Because, somewhere amidst those myriad lines of text, a fanboy/girl/person will start a flame war that will singe all innocent passers-by, like the internet equivalent of a swift kick to the balls.

There are many times when I'm all about entering the console comparison discussion. Contrasting the pros and cons of current and past gaming machines is vitally important, as it catches the eye of console-makers. By providing marketing research to companies like Sony, Sega, Nintendo, Apple, or the aspiring entrepreneur who will eventually create his own console manufacturing company, we journalists and gamers pave the way for a bright gaming future.

That said, I think I speak for a lot of us when I say I'm tired of reading this shit every damn day.

When it comes down to it, all major video game consoles have done something we gamers can applaud and respect: they've given us a platform on which we can play more games. This is not a bad thing. Microsoft's console may seem to favour pumping out meaty, testosterone-ridden first-person shooters that I don't particularly enjoy, and the Wii may be a juvenile rainbow factory, powered by happy thoughts and unicorn giggles (the products of which will likely give you type 1 diabetes), but both bring games to the table.

All consoles have the capacity to do good. We should focus on that.

So as we embark into a new episode of the console wars - the 3DS vs NGP - here is my request to you, stranger of the internet: the next time you feel the need to leap into a console flame war, don Sony's corporate logo as a tabard, or obliterate a pinata of Mario while dressed as the Master Chief, just remember...

When we fight amongst ourselves, the jocks win.


"A house, divided against itself, cannot stand."
- Abraham Lincoln


Footnotes

[1] ...it's definitely Kirk. ^

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- Greg Mengel

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